Communication with a Foreigner

People around the world were speaking the same language (English or something else) until the Tower of Babel event occurred. According to Genesis 11, the Lord God confused their speeches so that they could not understand each other and would scatter the entire world. That Biblical fact probably explained why most people felt more comfortable befriending, dating, or marrying someone of the same race, culture, etc even to this day. We always see white people with other whites; we always see black people with other blacks. The same thing applies to Asians, Hispanics, and people of other races too. But, some people, regardless of times (past, present, and future), are meant to form relationships with those who are different racially, culturally, physically, linguistically, etc. A good example is an international couple (Mark and Anna Davis) who has created Dream Connections because of their strong personal connection. They have not let language barriers, negativity, cultural differences, and indifference from other people destroy their marriage as well as their international dating/marriage business. They would be celebrating their tenth wedding anniversary in October 2017. I do expect to see a future video about this on their YouTube channel. They have been together since December 2006. If you want to succeed in an international friendship or marriage like them, you must do the following 5 tasks:

  • Continue the relationship with the foreigner.
    • Other people may come against both of you. You are struggling to communicate with the foreigner or vice versa. You cannot support him or her because you do not have enough money. Despite of those possible outcomes, stay with him or her. Once the relationship grows, both of you would realize that nothing else matters. Losing a connection with someone (especially to death) can be more painful than losing money or a house. In fact, Mark and Anna have experienced loss of their belongings a couple of years ago. But, the strength of their marriage has led them to joy, an awesome business (Dream Connections), and creation of more couples between American/Western men and foreign women.
  • Accept him or her for who he/she is.
    • Love his/her personality, flaws, strengths, and so. When it comes to true love, physical appearances, materialistic items, money, , cultural differences, etc. do not matter anymore. The important fact is that two living souls (whom God created) are cordially uniting for His purpose. Mark has mentioned in his YouTube videos that international couples do not remember the times before they met and connected with each other. They think that they have always known each other. That is what true love does to people. You can have an argument with your partner/spouse. You can have biological or adopted kid(s) with him/her. You can separate or divorce and move on with someone else. But, your feelings for him/her would never go away. Why do you think some people go back to their exes?
  • Keep the conversation with him/her light.
    • Say a few short words to him or her especially if you two have just met or known each other for a short time. If English is not his/her primary language, definitely speak words that are easy for him/her to understand. He/she would therefore know that you care and would want to take the relationship to the next level. I, for example, stay in contact with a Dominican woman I met on my trip last year. I text her occasionally on WhatsApp. But, the text messages I send her are short. She does the same with me. She speaks Spanish fluently but speaks little English. It is the other way around with me. But, we do have an undeniable connection. I plan to return to Dominican Republic and see her again next year.
  • Celebrate a holiday (e.g. Christmas or Valentine’s Day) or birthday (yours or his/hers) with him/her.
    • It would mean so much for him/her that you are thinking about him/her on a special day (holiday or birthday). You can send a message to him/her via email or social media (e.g. Facebook) if you are distant from him/her. But, if you are present with him/her, you can celebrate together and buy or exchange gifts with each other.
  • Learn his/her native language well and vice versa.
    • It shows respect and consideration for human feelings (yours and his/hers). Plus, you can build a stronger connection with not only him/her but also his/her family members and friends. The same thing would apply to him/her regarding your loved ones too. A language barrier is only a temporary problem; you and your friend/partner have to overcome it by continuously studying each other’s language.

If you (American or Western man) are interested in meeting foreign women who already speak English well, go to the Philippines. You can connect with them verbally and emotionally. You can successfully talk to any of them on phone without the help of a translator. Philippine women also speak other languages including Tagalog and Cebuano. I am indeed jealous of foreigners like them because they are bilingual/multilingual and I only speak one language. I wish that I had learned other languages at elementary school. Although I have studied Spanish since I was in high school, I still face difficulty with it today. However, I do not let this obstacle keep me from finding my future wife in Latin America. Another option for you is to visit 1 or more foreign countries where the main or second language is English. You would thus have no need to learn a foreign language at all.

In my opinion, social media (e.g. Facebook, WhatsApp, etc.) is better than email or phone communication. I have explained my reasons in a previous blog post. Click on the link so you can find them.

God has intended to put all of us humankind, different but equally and wonderfully made in His image (Genesis 1:27), on earth. We are stuck with one another whether we are similar or different, whether we live in the same country (e.g. United States) or not, whether we speak the same language (e.g. English) or not, whether we like each other or not, whether we believe in Him or not. We come from the same place (mother’s womb which is a description of our birth); we go back to dirt after we die (Ecclesiastes 12:7). We have no choice but to get along and communicate because we do have personal needs (food, water, job, affection, etc.). If we want to survive in this world, we have to put aside our feelings and help each other. If God has wanted to racially segregate us, he would have done so by putting us in separate planets or making us the same race.

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Mark and Anna Davis – international couple and owners of Dream Connections (Source: Vimeo)

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