Frankly, do you (American or Westernized man) or anyone else know why many people in United States (and maybe the Western world) are so:
- unfriendly to everyone?
- difficult to have a conversation?
- interested in only talking or connecting with people they know or like?
- aloof to those who are different in appearance, character, or both?
Maybe these questions explain that the suicide rate in United States is growing. It is sad that more Americans feel lonely, rejected, worthless, unloved, and so on. Like me, they should save their money for their vacations overseas. They would consequently realize how special and valuable their lives are.
Traveling or living in my country is far from easy. You may deal with ongoing problems with society, employment, government, health, etc. But, the 5 types of people who may drive you to isolation or relocation to another nation are:
local American women
Like society, media, and television shows, local dating (or online dating) has gone down the hill. Most men and probably you cannot enjoy a date without being judged for who you are (not) or being questioned about your income, materialistic items, etc. Nowadays, you cannot even ask a beautiful woman for a date or even have a simple and friendly conversation with her. She may walk away, put pepper spray in your eyes, threaten your life, call the police, or report you to your supervisor and get you written up, suspended, or fired. Fortunately, you do not have to face any of these negative consequences from a foreign woman. She and her beautiful Ukrainian, Chinese, etc. counterparts would be very glad to give you their attention.
There is that saying “It is easier to talk to strangers than it is with friends“. But, depending on where you go or who you encounter, sometimes communicating with stranger(s) is difficult. I do not know about your situation. But, as an introvert, I am careful about who I can trust and speak about my feelings. Everything from domestic marriage to politics seems to be a joke to everyone today. Nevertheless, I may be taken more seriously by foreigners. I can emotionally heal and move forward to something positive and meaningful thanks to them. If you ever experience depression, loneliness, or even grief and have no one to discuss your problem(s), you can always jump on an airplane, fly to your foreign destination (e.g. Thailand or Costa Rica), and find your solution(s) there.
distant family members
Maybe this category explains why I am unable to connect with other people (besides being shy and quiet). However, I can be myself completely around my immediate family. After all, I live with them. It would not be long until I have to get my own place though. I may be thrilled to have more privacy. But, spending more money for rent and possibly getting a 2nd job make me want to work so hard in attracting customers to my online business. Plus, I may have to bond and ask my estranged cousins for help on a personal need according to my parents. I feel so trapped where I live that I wish to return to Ukraine and stay there longer. If I successfully build a relationship with Viktoria and her family, I may depend on them more than I do with mines.
Whether you are close to your relatives or not, you can still fall in love with a foreign lady and consider her family as yours.
Friends come and go like almost everything else in United States does. Some lose interest in you while others move away. There is nothing you can say or do in order to keep the same ones in your life. However, remaining true to yourself and befriending diverse people who share your interests are necessary for your well-being. You would certainly succeed with both tasks if you go overseas. Your new friends, who may be a combination of foreigners, worldwide tourists, and American/Western expats, would be there for you indefinitely.
Facing them is just as challenging as getting away from them is. You cannot win either way. All you can do is prepare for a beatdown or threat from them. Reporting them to the police or authorities may help your case. But, if they are cyberbullies or online haters, you should be able to easily expose them. Just take and submit screenshot images of their malicious words, messages, etc. to whoever is in charge of disputes. Then, focus entirely on to those who support or like you for who you are. If you decide to have an unique business or blog like I do, you would win plenty of followers and viewers alike. Do not be surprised if some of them are foreigners. They are not going to despise or become jealous of your remarkable work like some Americans/Westerners would.
Truly, it is difficult to communicate or connect with someone in United States unless you are a family member, friend, colleague, charmer, or celebrity.
But, you do not have to be special in order to build a relationship with another human being overseas. You can be yourself 100%. You can relax whether you are alone or accompanied with him or her. You would feel like you are on cloud nine.
United States has changed dramatically. Many Americans are not the same as they have been in the past either. No one really cares much about each other anymore. You (if you live here) and I are pretty much on our own when it comes to what we need.
You can always approach someone in a foreign country (e.g. Thailand or Brazil).
You can probably do the same in a small American city.
You would however have more success with human connection abroad.
Most foreigners believe in sticking together and looking out for each other due to their collectivist cultures.
They are not selfish.
They are not distant.
They are not standoffish.
They are always there when you need them.
Let your heart encourage you to meet them and possibly your future wife.
You would have:
- 0 regrets for the rest of your life
- 1 woman to love and support you unconditionally
- many friendships with approachable people from all walks of life
You’ve commented on my site before so I figured I would return the favor. I haven’t been back in the states in a few years so I’m not surprised much hasn’t changed.
I usually just stay at home, work and spend time with family in the USA. I gave up trying to make friends and connect with people back in my 20’s. It’s just too much of a hassle to try and fit in.
Besides, Americans will influence you in negative ways and that can lead to more problems down the road!
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I agree with you, Tarik.
I do not have many friends either. I usually go to work, store or restaurant for food, and go home and either work on this blog or do something else on my laptop computer. I cannot wait to return to Ukraine in a couple of months and see a woman (Viktoria) I talk on Skype every month. There are so many stores, restaurants, clubs, approachable people, etc. where she lives. I cannot wait to explore them with her and other dates. Plus, I feel safer and more encouraged there than I do where I live.
People who do not go anywhere are really missing out on the amazing places, cool people, awesome foods, etc. that God has created.
Same can be said about Canada especially in Vancouver or Hongcouver as some people call it. Vancouver is filled with so much materialistic people and fake friends, the women are not much different they only love money and status and if you date one of the Asian women in Vancouver you have to have a lot of money and be in good with their circle of friends as well as have a really good job also they can be high maintenance.
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I am not saying that all people in United States, Canada, England, and the rest of the Western world are bad. In fact, there are people who are down-to-earth, caring, approachable, selfless, etc. in those countries. But, you are only going to find a small number of them locally or around your nation.
If you, I, or anyone else wants to find people who are easy to talk, connect, respect, and so on, he or she can go somewhere like Thailand, Philippines, Colombia, Costa Rica, Brazil, Australia, Ukraine, Sweden, Ethiopia, Cape Verde, Japan, Iceland, etc.
I am sorry to say this. But, most people in United States and the Western world are hard to deal. That is why I have some difficulty in talking and connecting with them. It does not matter if they are coworkers, bosses, total strangers, acquaintances, or even estranged family members.
Going to my job 5 days a week can be painful to me sometimes. As a result, I am returning to school so that I can get a better job. I continue to work hard and do my best for this blog and my online business. Hopefully, I would get extra money and move on to improvement of my life as well as helping other people make their lives better.